Ooooohhh I just have to tell you about the fabulous time I had at the American Legion Post the other night. It was Friday and since Wayne was out of town for the weekend, he said he was going to visit a sick friend but I think he really went squirrel hunting, I decided to go out to eat with the girls. Hey, I’m not that old that I can’t consider myself as one of the girls; I was the youngest one there and I haven’t even had a hip replacement yet, so there.
They started serving dinner at 5 o’clock and we got there early so we decided to have a little drinkypoo while we were there. I wasn’t driving so I put in my order. Do you know, they don’t know how to make a Quiet Snuzzle or a Friggin’ Quickie. I told them Wayne talked about them all the time when he came home late from the Legion; I just assumed they would know how to make them. Well they didn’t; so they suggested I order either a ‘Mar Teeny’ or a “Long ‘something’ Iced Tea.” The tea sounded like it would go good with my fish dinner. I don’t know what they put in my ‘tea’ but it made the temperature in the room go up. Maybe they stirred it instead of shaking it. Anyway I had to go outside and flap my dress. The other girls ordered beer but it didn’t affect them any that I could tell. I wonder if Wayne knows how to mix that drink. It was so nice.
Anyway I was feeling pretty good when it came time to order my supper. I got the ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT broasted fish with a baked potato. They had the loveliest crispy-fresh salad and there were rolls, and pudding, several kinds of salad dressing, and Jell-O, and I could have gotten French fries or macaroni & cheese instead of the baked potato. I can’t imagine eating macaroni & cheese with fish, yuck.
I was almost finished with my fish when this cute young thing came by and filled my plate up again. The fifth time she came by I just had to tell her, “No.” I hadn’t eaten my potato yet; in fact I hadn’t even unwrapped the aluminum foil from around it. I wrapped it in a napkin to take home. I shouldn’t have put it in my skirt pocket because it left a big red hickey-looking welt on my . . . well let’s just say it was noticeable when I took a shower. I know Wayne wondered about it but he never said a thing and I never volunteered to tell him. That’ll teach him to go squirrel hunting when I come home feeling in such a good mood.
The evening went very well although I couldn’t find Commander “Chucky” Rathsack anywhere. I do so wanted to tell him how much I loved the Legion Post now that they have the old cigarette smoke sucking fans or whatever they’re called, installed. I can enjoy eating there now. I knew they’d been installed for quite a while but I really haven’t been in for a while. I’ll have to give American Legion Post 241 a whole batch of plastic forks of approval for the lovely time I had.
I love their broasted fish but I really should try the broasted chops sometime. Maybe the next time I’ll have my tubby hubby Wayne try them and let him write about them. Although if he writes like he talks when he eats, the page will come out, “Chomp, glumph, glarp, chew, snarf, gleeb slurp.” I know my Wayne; he’ll leave his little fat greasy handprints all over my pooter, Hewy. I think Hewy is such a cute nickname don’t you?
The girls said I was up and dancing to the Junkyard Band later, but I don’t recall doing anything like that. I think they were putting me on. They know I love to dance and I do remember going outside to flap my dress a time or two but I think they were making up the rest of the story. We did get in home early so I couldn’t have done very much. If anyone finds my potato, let me know where you found it. It could clear up some of the mystery. Till next time, Taa Taaa.
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