MISTLE TOE, SHMISTLE TOE-MY FEET HURT!!!
The day after Christmas our phone rang. An elf was calling. His boss was in dire need of our assistance. It seems the day and night before he had traveled many miles and had delivered millions of presents.
The objective findings of this case include an overweight, round, jolly, older man with white hair and beard and a very painful Achilles tendon. I also noticed some soot in his hair and the residue of cookies and milk in his beard.
In our office we make it a point to schedule our appointments so that we can usually fit an emergency patient in. There are some foot problems that simply do not occur when it is convenient. If your ingrown nail gets infected, if you sprain an ankle, if you drop a frozen 25 pound turkey on your foot, if your heel is lacerated during a shark attack or a meteor strike, the last thing you want to hear is "I am sorry the earliest the doctor will be able to see you is in 4 weeks."
If you experience such a malady we will see you as soon as humanly possible.
I am happy to report that we were able to treat the older gentleman within a few hours of his call. He had Achilles tendonitis which is considered an 'overuse syndrome'. It would seem that jumping up and down a few million chimneys would constitute overuse.
We were able to improve his symptoms with physical therapy, taping, stretching and strengthening exercises and some non-steroidal anti-inflammatory medications. He seemed very pleased.
As he left he pulled out his snow proof Palm Pilot and wrote in it. "Thank you very much, Dr. Chubinski. I feel much better. I will have to move you from the 'naughty' to the 'nice' list."
"Thank you sir I would really appreciate that. I do not need any more coal. It does not burn well in our patio grill. And sir..."
"When you come for your follow up appointment would you please park in the parking lot. It is easier to clean up reindeer droppings from the asphalt than from the roof."
"If I must. But it's so boring. I suppose I should use the door and not the chimney too?"
"I think so."
"All right if I must." As he left he turned, grinned, waved and let out a hearty, "Ho! Ho! Ho!"
Happy Holidays from Dr. Chubinski and the staff of the Waynedale and Huntington Foot Clinics.