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If your bucket has a hole in it, get a new one.

Thomas Jefferson
April 13th is Thomas Jefferson's birthday.
The following is a quote by John F. Kennedy.
"I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered at the White House with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone."

Father Jeff
Father Jeff is quite a guy,
I really like his Mass.
His entire parish also does,
Because it's pretty fast.
(Sorry Lord I really didn't want you to read this).

Gas
Now the environ-mentalists are blaming the recent Artic snow and freezing temperatures that covered almost half of the country, are the result of "Global Warming." I honestly think those prophets of doom will blame everything from volcanic eruptions to flatulence on "Global Warming." Isn't that a gas?

Hic!
A recent study has found that too much sugar can kill you. It has been shown to increase blood pressure, cholesterol, triglycerides, etc., etc. The U.S. Center of Disease Control and Prevention called the results sobering. Gee, I have a sweet tooth and all that sugar never sobered me. Hic!


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