Oooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I just have to tell you that me and Wayne, er, Wayne and me, uh, Wayne and I, whatever, had just the loveliest time on Thanksgiving Day and for most of that weekend for that matter. We got up and had the nicest turkey dinner and of course we were naked the whole weekend, that is until we had to run to the store for something; then we put on our matching baby blue sweat suits with the racing stripes to do that.
It’s always good to keep them handy in case the paperboy comes by or maybe the Avon lady. Then you have to remember, the Jehovah’s Witnesses sometimes come knocking on your door but then whether or not you put them on at that time is strictly up to you; it will cause some shocked looks I can assure you that. Wayne did it just once by mistake; he actually forgot that he wasn’t covered and well they only got a ‘small’ peek but I think it was enough for them to spread the word among the other Witnesses that our door shouldn’t be knocked on, ever again.
Have you ever done that? Just spend the whole day running around your house or apartment free as a Jaybird? It was Thanksgiving and we had notified every one of our family and friends that we would be indisposed on Thanksgiving Day weekend and thanks for their invitations to dinner but no thanks; we had other plans but we never hinted at what they were; I think they knew but never said anything. I think they were inspired and intrigued by their own imaginations since they know us pretty well. It wouldn’t surprise me if they didn’t do the same thing. Did you ever notice how many people shop at Scott’s or Kroger in their sweats??????
We decided NOT to go to a lot of trouble preparing a huge turkey dinner with all the fixin’s this year but instead we donated the money from what a dinner like that would have cost to the Rescue Mission, the Salvation Army, and the Red Cross. We didn’t do it all at once mind you but contributed a little out of each of our Social Security checks to the cause. We’ve seen what they do for the community’s less fortunate and we approve enough to help them out.
Anyway, we spent the whole time Au Natural and enjoyed it immensely. When it came to breakfast we had cold cereal, a banana, lukewarm coffee, and toast – no danger of burns there and lunch was peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, pickled egg salad, and warm tea. For our Thanksgiving dinner, we chose to do a turkey breast in a crock-pot the day before and have slices of it warmed up in the microwave oven with store-bought turkey gravy, canned sweet potatoes, canned baby sweet peas, and canned cranberry sauce on the side. We toasted our day with iced box wine – it’s cheaper you know.
It wasn’t a very elegant dinner by the Queen of England’s standards but it was OK by ours. We topped off our dinner with slices of pound cake, a dollop of blueberry pie filling on top, and a tad of Dream Whip on top of the blueberries. I ate two helpings but decided to quit after spilling some of the ice-cold blueberries where it took a shower to remove them. Wayne helped me of course and we had the swellest time of it but then I’m sure you’ve all done the same thing or wished you had enough gumption to do it; am I right or what?
We watched the Macy’s parade Thanksgiving Day morning, the Lions/Patriots football game in the afternoon, and snacked on popcorn, cheese corn, and caramel corn between meals. Remember this: always wash your hands after eating caramel corn and before scratching an itch anywhere. The same goes for cheese corn. It was good though; we bought a tin of it off a cute little Boy Scout that was going around selling Trails End popcorn sometime back and yes, we had on our sweats. We bought just about a ton of the stuff since it is good, it keeps well, and it helps the little tykes to earn money for camp.
I would advise anyone that wants to spend a day like we did to plan ahead of time by cooking whatever needs to be cooked the day before and then just heat it up in the microwave oven to avoid burns in embarrassing places. Also remember those oven doors get hot I mean to tell you and watch out about slamming cabinet doors or closing drawers that are just less than waist high.
We found it’s necessary to wear slippers or flip-flops in case we dropped something on the floor that was sharp or pointy. And you’d better cover your sofa cushions and chair bottoms with towels and I shouldn’t have to tell you why you should do that; it will become apparent later on. Also avoid sudden urges of any kind and enjoy the day. Oh, and don’t forget to turn up the heat a tad to avoid chills but I guess you could wear a sweater to keep your shoulders warm like Wayne did. We just can’t wait for the next long weekend.
Until next time, TAA TAAA.
“Wayne, I think I found another blueberry.”